Ok, after having a very "Godly" morning on Friday, Saturday was my undoing.
I completely and totally lost it.
I heard about the house inspection from our realtor.
(no, this is not my house)
Now, let me back up and give you a little history. The contract we signed is an "As-Is" contract. It gives the buyer 10 days to have the home inspected, but there is no requirement for us to fix anything that is found in the inspection. On the other hand, the buyer can walk away from the contract within those 10 days and they do not have to have any reason other than they don't want to move forward.
Now, as to the house, here is what we've done to get it ready to sell:
- new roof
- new flooring throughout with the exception of the kitchen and entry area
- new kitchen appliances
- new granite kitchen countertop
- the master bathroom shower was re-tiled
- The AC/Heat was replaced in 2009
- the pool pump was replaced early this year
- the sprinkler pump was replaced early this year
- the interior was completely repainted neutral colors
- new sod in 2011
- exterior garage exit door was replaced
- lots of other nit-picky stuff was fixed
We had heard that the inspector only took 1 hr to inspect the house and the only other thing we had heard was that everything was minor.
But the buyer asked us to fix EVERYTHING ON THE REPORT.
You know, stuff like
- Electrical cover plate must be installed by a licensed electrician
REALLY!?!?!?!?
- Torn Weather stripping must be replaced by a licensed contractor
Are you KIDDING Me!?!?!?
- Cracked tiles need to be replaced by a licensed contractor
What crack!?!?!?! You can hardly see it.
- Sliding glass door lock needs to be lubricated by a licensed contractor
Seriously!?!??!?!
and a few other issues.
I waited until my dad got home (CP had gone to a Boy Scout function with JA and AT), went into his room with him, closed the door and I lost it.
I used words that rarely (like maybe once a year) come out of my mouth. I cried; I yelled; I screamed; I pounded the bed. I pounded his recliner chair.
L-I-V-I-D
barely begins to describe my feelings. I think a lot of it was just pent up frustration in dealing with the house. When I was done (mostly), I came out and had to take the kids to the store. Of course, they heard (muffled, I hope) the commotion I was making, but none of it was directed at them (or my Dad).
But afterward, I wondered...
Did I sin in my anger?
This is a question I have struggled with for many years. What is an appropriate expression of anger?
I know some of you all deal with kids that rage for hours. I know that's not OK. But what is?
I searched the Bible for all scriptures that used the word "anger" and mostly what I found is "don't let your anger control you".
Well, in many ways, my anger did control me for a good 15-30 minutes. Was that sin?
But Jesus walked through the Temple turning over tables and completely disrupting everything;
and He didn't sin.
So what is the threshold? I don't know? Any ideas?
P.S. This is the house we are trying to sell. Anyone want to move to FL?
P.P.S. We have agreed to fix almost everything, but we haven't had a response from the buyer whether or not that is acceptable to them. Please continue to pray.
6 comments:
Oh man! Girl, my heart aches for you. You have been through so much with this house. I know how much you want to be done with it. I do hope, after all fixing all this, the buyers don't walk. I'm so so very sorry this has been so difficult. Big cyber hugs until I can hug ya in person!
To me, I think it's healthy to lose it every once in awhile. You have to let the anger go, and sometimes doing what you did is the only way. At least you did it behind closed doors and not for the kids to see. I think if we keep it pent up it can turn into more anger and/or rage and can come out at any time, and we wouldn't want that. Lots of prayers for you and the house selling!
UGH. I do think you were appropriately angry, and because you managed it well and got it out and "over," I do not see how you should be worried about sin. In fact, the very fact that you are questioning your anger is likely a good sign--your awareness and desire to please God in this area likely means you did the right thing.
On facebook, I shared a photo recently: the text read, "When someone asks you "What Would Jesus Do?" remind them that freaking out and flipping tables is a viable option. ; )
I'm praying right now!
Beautiful house! I can't answer the question about anger and sin because only God knows the source of the anger, which I suspect is the key. But oh man, how frustrating to have the house you have invested so much in treated as a collection of problems, and to have buyers not playing by the ground rules of the sale. :-(
Very pretty place! Sorry not a chance of moving my farm boys from GA. :)
So glad to read the update above that you have a date. So hoping this time goes through and that check is deposited.
As to your question, I think in this instance really you didn't sin. You didn't take it out on your kids, or your husband or your Dad for that matter. You went away to a separate place and closed the door. You did it mostly in private. And your Dad is obviously wise enough to be your sounding board. I'm sure hearing you out on this was nothing for him.
I otoh lately seem to be losing it in front of my kids and DH, and yes, letting some word bombs fly. What in the world? I am just at the end of my rope with what I see as nitpicky grumbling from children who yes, should be grateful for all they have (I don't mean being adopted, but rather food, clothing, a roof, and this applies to all of them).
I'm tired of being the punching bag while Daddy is the hero. I don't know how to combat that, and I don't think it is possible. He is here with them 3 hours a day M-F, and I'm the one dealing with all of the stuff and handing out assignments, some of which they hate.
So, ahem, there you go. See I've got issues LOL! Maybe I need to come down for a visit and borrow you and your Dad and pound the arm of his recliner while y'all listen?!
Keep on keeping on. That is all we can do some days.
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